Cons, TP and . . . It Stinks

Several septic salespeople made a few things up:

A South Florida trio is facing up to two decades in prison after they were allegedly involved in a $1 million toilet paper scam in Palm Beach County.

Federal prosecutors said the three conned elderly customers into buying unnecessary septic products, in some cases more than 70 years worth of toilet paper, CBS4 news partner The Miami Herald reported.

That’s a lot of trees.

According to the Herald, the three worked for FBK Products of West Palm Beach. They told more than a dozen of their victims that they needed the company’s special toilet paper to avoid ruining their septic tanks. They told their victims that the federal government changed regulations on toilet paper, the Herald reported. The federal government, though, does not regulate septic tank products.

OK. But since the federal government seems to regulate just about everything else, why would these poor souls (who are old enough to remember the beginning of the all-powerful federal government in the days of FDR) not think that this made a lot of sense? After all, the con only works if it seems logical. Right?